Sunday, June 11, 2017

The Surprising Benefits of Being a "YES" Woman

No one taught me to be a "YES" woman.  My teachers taught me to dissect, debate, and defend. My mentors tell me leaders are usually going against the tide. My parents taught me to be independent, assertive, curious, loyal, kind, and faithful but they never served crap for dinner. Thus, I am adverse to swallowing things that look, taste, and smell like hmmmm poop.

Verbally agreeing to everything someone is saying when I vehemently disagree internally is, shall we say, not one one of my strengths. Listening carefully while quietly reflecting in order to give a measured, thoughtful response at some future date is smart and professional. I do that often. I just cannot, in good conscious, endorse a plan I sincerely believe is doomed for epic failure in order to gain someone's confidence or approval. For men, this trait garners respect. They say the guy has a spine. In women, well, I only speak for myself---so in this woman's life, a propensity for giving an honest opinion has not always served me well. Instead of shattering the glass ceiling, it became a reason to install limousine tint, bars, and an armed guard to keep me in my place.

What becomes of a person who can't look up and see beyond their circumstances?

That should have made me a YES woman, but it didn't. It only made me distrustful and overly cautious. Then, I saw the movie, "Yes, Man" starring Jim Carrey. I don't even like his movies that much but, for some reason I can't explain, I decided to try it. I started saying yes to every legal invitation I received. It was a bit frightening but guess what happened? I went kayaking for the first time! I sang a solo at my parents' fiftieth wedding anniversary!  Lol! As I am a horrible singer, this was a huge leap of faith. I bought a round of drinks (Dr. Pepper) for the bar! I collaborated with a new group of entrepreneurs on an amazing initiative. I took chances.

I realized that I had let control take control of me. The pitiful glass ceiling in my career only covered one room. I simply had to move. In doing so, I kicked down walls, opened my fists, and felt a sense of exhilaration I hadn't felt since Six Flags over Texas installed a double loop roller coaster. Guess what happens to a ceiling without support?

Feeling trapped? Let go of the need to know the end of every beginning. Take a chance on something new and let the sunshine in.


Monica Frazier Anderson
@drmOeAnderson

Entrepreneur Is A Lifestyle, Not A Title


Thinking of leaving that corporate job and starting your own business? That's a great idea but there are many important factors to consider before you take the plunge. In this audio excerpt, Dr. mOe shares important questions you should ask and answer before you make a commitment that will impact every aspect of your life. Dr. mOe is a serial entrepreneur who has achieved business success in retail, health care, real estate, and publishing. Hear her share lessons learned and best practices from her own experiences. For more, subscribe to her iTunes podcast and YouTube channel. Then, visit her website at www.drmoeanderson.com today!


Check out this podcast episode!

Friday, February 3, 2017

Dr mOe Bobsleighing in LaPlagne, France (2017)






France is one of my favorite places to visit in Europe, especially Paris. When I got the opportunity to go skiing at the 2nd largest ski resort in the world, Paradiski in LaPlagne France, I was ecstatic.Wow! Experience of a lifetime. During one excursion between ski classes, we took a ride on the Bobsleigh track used in the '92 Winter Olympics. Our speed reached 80km/h. It was a jarring, exhilarating adrenaline rush! That's me - second from the front - light teal ski jacket. I have had a bucket list since I turned 40 years old. I could not cross bobsleighing off my list because I never dreamed of putting it on there! Lesson learned. Life is not a test. It's okay if some questions go unanswered.

Remember, your bucket list is not for dying, it's for living. Carpe diem!

#successisasideeffect #drmoeanderson.com

Friday, January 15, 2016

Love Lessons from A to Zen





I have gained experiential wisdom from the loves of my life. Some lessons were exceptionally good. Some were simply enlightening. But, they all were essential in making me a better-than-I-used-to-be human…in progress.






A- absence is bad for the heart.
B- breathing deeply is an art form.
C- cuddling cures a bad day.
D- destiny is fluid.
E- exes don’t need a eulogy every day.
F- forgiveness propels you forward.
G- God is very detail oriented.
H- habit is a poor excuse for cheating.
I- imagi-Nation is a great place to travel.
J- joy—real joy—comes from within.
K- kindness in a kindred spirit is intoxicating.
L- lies are never little or white.
M- making good memories doesn’t require a passport or money.
N- never is relative.
O- over & I’m out might be a gift.
P- peace takes more courage than war.
Q- quiet is the sound of God’s sigh.
R- rain is a wonderful shower.
S- supernovas also occur on land.
T- to be or not to be requires strategic planning.
U- understanding.
V- vengeance is expensive.
W- wait, then, wait some more when you’re angry.
Y- you deserve happiness.
Z- Zenith is love unleashed!

Copyright 2016 Monica F Anderson
www.drmOeanderson.com
@drmoeanderson

Sunday, December 20, 2015

Apollo

Apollo SwimmingI am unclean and my grandson, Apollo, wants to watch “A Bug’s Life” again. He is 3-years-old with all the rights and privileges thereof. We have watched this DVD twice every day. I know every scene-every word-every syllable of every word. He flat out refuses to use Mickey Mouse headphones I bought him and I am not allowed to leave his side. I have been swimming with him. We have been to an indoor playground where I crawled through tubes, climbed ladders, and slipped down slides at a very high velocity. (For the record, the oldest and largest person should go down the slide before the toddler; an obscure law of physics one should never forget.) I even played video games at the arcade. Most of the time, I didn’t actually put a token in the machines. He didn’t seem to notice that the score wasn’t changing. Or perhaps he did notice and that is why he is torturing me with this insect movie.

That’s why I am unclean. I don’t mean in the biblical sense; I mean I am afraid to stay in the shower for more than 2-3 minutes. So I alternate cleaning my major muscles like I alternate weightlifting at the gym. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday upper body, then, Tues and Thursdays thighs and calves. If I tarry too long, Apollo begins to do magic tricks. He can make random, dangerous objects appear out of nowhere. In fact, I didn’t know I owned so many books of matches. Who even uses matches anymore?

Anyway, every time he watches the movie, he laughs at the same jokes. He is mesmerized by the colors and characters. Do you know how much money I would save if I could be content with only one DVD? No more Netflix or Amazon streaming movies. No HBO fight nights. No Redbox.
Strange as it seems, he is teaching me something about patience and being in the moment. The more I watch this movie, the more I notice new, different things that I missed before rather like watching the old DVD’s of his father and brother when they were about his age. After he leaves, I’ll put the DVD on a shelf with the others. The memories? I suppose they will replay in my mind over and over, making me laugh at the same scene every time.

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Their Eyes Are Not Watching God



“It takes courage to grow in public.”—Bishop T.D. Jakes

The fact is we ALL have public lives. Big Sister is everywhere and her eyes are not watching God. Social media posts, volunteerism, job, dating, classes…keep us in the windows of the world, on display every day.

Most of us think celebrities, elected leaders, and VIP’s are the only ones who have a high profile existence. They are constantly in front of cameras. Every word and action is closely scrutinized and added to the fragmented collages we create from snapshots of their daily lives. The most fascinating thing is how quick we are to attack someone when they change their position on an issue. We are swift to remind them what they said in the past.

I write from experience when I say there are few feelings worse than having someone denounce you with your own words. Who wants to be called a hypocrite or liar because they changed their mind and exercised their inalienable right to continuous--often painful--growth? Imagine a world where no one ever changes their mind about anything: slavery, women’s right to vote, war, bad behavior…. Stay the course and Moby Dick yourself to spiritual death. That is hell to me. If not hell, then our current United States Congress but I digress.

Find the courage to change, and then act quickly. Be more afraid of not trying, than failing. I begin every new journey with the admission that I am flawed and I may flop, but I do not plan for failure. I think of multiple ways to succeed, including giving up if or when x + x = z. How is giving up success? Thomas Edison said it best, “I have not failed, I’ve just found [another way] that won’t work.” This is not a position. This is a perspective.

Fear is a bully.

Fight it.


Monica “Dr. mOe” Anderson is an author, speaker, dentist, and survivor. Her latest book “Success Is A Side Effect” is available in e-Book and paperback.
Website: www.drmoeanderson.com
Twitter: @drmoeanderson
Facebook:  Dr. Moe Anderson Author & Speaker

Sunday, June 21, 2015

Why Doesn't Batwoman Have A Sidekick?


Balance, as in life balance, might as well be a four-letter word because it seems like a no-no for us grinders. I know people who won’t even admit when they are tired or overwhelmed. But if we want our sons, daughters, loved ones, or acquaintances to have balanced lives that include work, rest, and play, then we need to role-model that balance. If your actions say you can do everything at any time without any help, don’t complain when everyone is happy to let you be Batwoman and save the world. Why doesn’t Batwoman have a sidekick anyway, like Batman, Robinson Crusoe, and the Lone Ranger? And why is she wearing a swimsuit and boots? What kind of crime-fighting attire is that? Superman wore flats and Batman had a butler. Batwoman is fictional. That’s why. Keep it real. You can do it all but you cannot do it all well. Someone or something will suffer. In the words of Phyllis Diller, “Housework won’t kill you, but why take the chance?”